Pregnancy is a magical, worrying and exciting time. There’s an awful lot to consider. With all the symptoms you experience, dealing with the extreme fatigue and worrying about whether your baby is growing as it should, there’s a lot to think about day-to-day.
This only ramps up towards the end of your pregnancy when the realization that you’ll very soon be bringing home an actual baby begins to become a reality. That’s after you get through the birth.
With all this on your mind, how you feel and especially how you look are very often at the bottom of your list, but it’s important to remember that there is still a you, even after you’ve had your baby, you are still very important and worth looking after. In this article, we take a look at life post-pregnancy and some practical ways of looking after you both.
Your Healthy Mind
Post-birth can be a daze of nappies, sleeplessness and having very little idea about what you’re doing. It’s also the time you, generally, fall completely in love with your baby. This all sounds good in theory, except when it’s not.
Exhaustion, coupled with the fear of getting things wrong and any pre-existing tendencies towards depression can trigger postpartum depression or at the very least some feelings of anxiety.
This is perfectly normal, you are perfectly normal. What you need to do is tell someone. Tell your partner, tell your best friend, your doctor, or your health visitor. Keep telling people until you get the help you need and the support that will help put you back on the path to feeling better.
A little extra support from friends and family is not a weakness on your part, it’s what people have done for centuries in their communities so accept help, take a nap, go for a walk to clear your head, and allow your loved ones to take some of the responsibility off of your shoulders.
Over time, as your baby gradually learns to sleep a little more these symptoms should ease by themselves, but if you do not see an improvement then do go back to your doctor and talk to them about what you’re experiencing. It might be a short course of medication that will be all it takes to help you to feel better.
Alongside catching up on sleep when you can, there is a lot to be said for getting outside. We’re not talking about a run or a session down the gym but a walk somewhere picturesque and calming can help restore your equilibrium a little and give you both a little fresh air. Take a friend with you if you’d rather not go out alone and gradually find a routine and rhythm to your new life that feels comfortable and comforting.
Your Healthy Body
Again, we’re not talking about starting about a whole new exercise regime here but if you were fit and healthy before your pregnancy, you may be missing the feeling of being that way.
Give your body time to recover from the birth, particularly if you have gone through a c-section before you do anything remotely athletic and ease yourself back in gently. If you’re a runner then start with a walking program that gradually builds up, but listen to your body at all times and if it’s telling you to stop, then make sure to slow down and take a break.
The same for all other types of sports, including lifting weights in your gym. Start very light and avoid doing anything that will rupture any scar tissue or stitches you may still have. You’ll find plenty of post-partum exercises on YouTube that will give you some ideas, including yoga, which may help you to feel calmer as you start feeling stronger.
How you look might be very much at the bottom of your list of things to care about but if you do feel that you’d like to find something of your old self under there then you’ll find a host of information and advice out there on the internet and the blogging community, everything from how to carry your newborn to The 10 Best Ways To Tighten Loose Skin After Pregnancy.
If it makes you feel better and something approaching normal again then go for it. Often it’s the little things, such as a brand new body cream or some new mascara that can help you feel more like you so embrace whatever works for you.
You And Baby
At some point in those first few crazy weeks, you will have found yourself gazing into your baby’s eyes and feeling both overwhelmed and head over heels in love with the little bundle lying in front of you. That feeling just grows, along with your ability to read your baby’s needs and become more in tune with what they’re looking for when they cry and fuss.
Very often at this point, the well-meaning advice comes pouring in from all quarters, from grandparents who’ve done it all to friends who want to help you with advice from their own experiences.
It’s also at this point that you’re allowed to stand firm. If you have an idea of how you want to incorporate some kind of routine then a polite but firm “thank you but we’re trying out this technique”, will suffice. If your friend or family member keep offering their unsolicited advice, then feel free to ask them to stop. The rules are it’s your baby and you’re parenting your way. That’s final.
It might be that you have no routine in place and no intention of finding one, that’s also fine and completely down to you, no one has any right to tell you otherwise unless you are putting your baby in harm’s way.
Along the same lines, there are plenty of parenting books out there. If you choose to follow someone’s advice then good for you, if not, just as valid a decision. In truth, most parenting is a mixture of lots of different schools of thought. Sometimes you’ll find yourself in the attachment parenting school of thought as you snuggle with your baby, wearing him or her in a sling while at other times you might enjoy the predictability of a routine where your baby sleeps for a couple of hours at lunchtime and you get to enjoy lunch or a nap in peace.
At the end of the day, you and your partner are in charge of the dynamic of your family and know what will work best for you and your baby. It’s hard to say no thank you to well-meaning advice but that advice from all different quarters can be overwhelming and it has the added element of making you think you might be doing something wrong, which can be crippling for your confidence.
Having a baby is full-on from the moment you find yourself pregnant to the second you change a nappy for the first time. Those few weeks, though tough, do go past quickly and very soon life with a small baby becomes the norm. During that time it’s important to place your health at the forefront. Happy, healthy parents feel more confident, more able to respond to the challenges of a newborn and all the pressures that entail.
Look after yourself and reach out for help should you need it. You’ve got through pregnancy and you can get through this too.
These are all great tips. I pinned it in hopes someone can use this advice!
ReplyDeleteEven though there are a lot of baby and mommy books out there, not all of them are helpful. You know you - that won’t change, just your hormones- for a while! Your article is right on & that’s why I pinned it. Everything revolves around your little newborn and you can get lost in the shuffle. Don’t let yourself! It’s just temporary. I concentrated on the happiness of becoming a mommy and prayed. I thanked God and talked to Him constantly. He always calms me and comforted me! Plus He blessed me with this life because He knew I could take care of her! Thank you for sharing and giving new moms comfort and help with this temporary situation in their lives. This too shall pass ��
ReplyDeleteI agree that it's really essential for new moms to take care of themselves. I mean, if Mom isn't well, everybody suffers.
ReplyDelete