HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY! :D
I took an accidental break last week and I apologize. I promise I will catch up. :)
So since today is Valentine's Day, I wanted to talk about a topic that is very, VERY important when you are bringing a new baby into the mix, making time for marriage. When I was pregnant the first time around, I didn't know how to involve my Hubby into the pregnancy. I made everything all about me or the baby and I didn't do a very good job with making sure he didn't feel left out. I guess I thought because we were trying to have a baby that he was just on board. Yes, I was going through all these changes physically, but I wasn't considering how he was going through everything emotionally. And because I didn't address these issues when I was pregnant, SweetPea's first year of life was hard. I continued making everything all about her and didn't make time for him and therefore he didn't make time for me. So I have decided to share the ways that I made changes, so this time he didn't feel left out. Whether you planned your pregnancy or not, here are my tips that have helped us through the past couple years. :)
1. Make sure you still date. Restaurant.com is a great resource to save money on going out to eat. You can also have tons of fun by even staying home with the help of Netflix or RedBox. But you need to make sure you still make one-on-one time with your Hubby.
2. Tell each other you love each other often, even if you're mad. Sometimes you can't resolve the argument before you go to bed or your spouse leaves for work, but even if you are mad at them, you still love them.
3. It's okay to apologize and say you're sorry. Don't let your ego get in the way when you know you are wrong. Sometimes you think that something you may have done wasn't a big deal, but it hurt your spouse's feelings. Say you're sorry that their feelings are hurt and explain where you are coming from. Apologizing doesn't mean you are admitting fault.
4. Talk about what's on your mind. Sometimes just talking about the stress (even if it can't be fixed) can make a big difference.
5. Communication is key. Everyone says this and it sounds cliche, but it's true. Even when you are arguing you, make sure it is productive. Just because you are "talking" doesn't mean you are saying the right things. You're mad, tell him why and how you feel, ask him how he is feeling. It sounds simple, but communicating the right way can take years of practice.
6. Let your child see the resolve and see how much you love each other. Show your spouse you love them. Your child will learn how to treat their spouse (and how to be treated BY their spouse) from watching their mother and father. So treat your significant other how you want your child treated.
Okay, now it's your turn.
What are some ways you feel help a marriage when there is a baby on board?
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My husband and I spend time together right after our daughter goes to sleep for the night. We will usually just curl up and watch our favorite tv shows.
ReplyDeleteMichelle F.
Such great (and important) points! After 3 kids, my husband and I are just learning how to prioritize and making sure that our relationship is considered, rather than forgotten. I really like your tips, but especially numbers 1 & 5. My husband and I just went on a date today - it can really rejuvenate your relationship!
ReplyDeleteMy husband and I try to spend time together every night, even if it is just for a few mins.. AFter the kids have gone to bed is our time. The weekends we get more time together which is great!
ReplyDeleteEven when your child is a baby, you can sneak moments together, sometimes you just have to be creative :)
ReplyDelete~ Kimberly
We always try to make time for each other but between work, 3 kids, and other responsibilities sometimes we fail to spend as much time as we should.
ReplyDeleteThese are great tips for any relationship even if there's a baby involved or not.
ReplyDeleteGreat tips, especially that communication is key. It can be overwhelming!
ReplyDeleteGreat tips after 29 years we have learned lol I love the pictures so beautiful!
ReplyDelete